Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

Valérian et la Cité des mille planètes

2017

Luc Besson
Director
EuropaCorp
Production Company

Idyllic alien world is turned upside down by human intrusion. Two human space agents become involved.

Convoluted comic book saga has eye candy and imagination galore but is fatally flawed by lacklustre leads, oddball pacing and still feels like there's an hour missing (John Goodman's vengeful alien, where did he go?).

The opening credits scene is a lovely thing to behold.

~the sloth

Sprawling space epic is beautiful to look out, but the two leads have absolutely zero appeal or chemistry and make the whole thing a chore. Delevingne in particular looks like she's fulfilling the terms of a lost bet. Or maybe that's what passes for 'acting' these days. Watch it with the sound off and enjoy the visuals, or re-watch The Fifth Element.

-Dave W.



26th July 2017
Cinema






31st July 2017
Cinema


129 mins
2.35:1


2nd August 2017
Cinema






21st November 2017
Blu-Ray



137 mins





"
Dane DeHaan
Valerian
Cara Delevingne
Laureline
Clive Owen
Commander Arün Filitt
Rihanna
Bubble
Rihanna
Bubble
Ethan Hawke
Jolly The Pimp
Herbie Hancock
Defence Minister
Kris Wu
Captain Neza
Sam Spruell
General Okto Bar
Alain Chabat
Bob the Pirate
Rutger Hauer
President of the World State Federation
Peter Hudson
Captain Crowford
Xavier Giannoli
Captain Norton
Louis Leterrier
Captain Welcoming Mercurys
Eric Rochant
Captain Welcoming Palm Müret
Benoît Jacquot
Captain Welcoming Arysum
Olivier Megaton
Captain Welcoming KCO2
Gérard Krawczyk
Captain Welcoming Martapuraïs
Pierre Cachia
Kortan Dahük (?)
David Saada
Kortan Dahük (?)
Hippolyte Burkhart-Uhlen
Kortan Dahük (?)
Florian Guichard
Mercury (?)
Stéphane Mir
Mercury (?)
Thierry Barthe
Mercury (?)
Pier Ewudu
Palm Müret (?)
Andrew Tisba
Palm Müret (?)
Yannick Lorté
Palm Müret (?)
Charly Akakpo
Arysum-Kormn (?)
Clément Beauruelle
Arysum-Kormn (?)
Audrey Kamp
Arysum-Kormn (?)
Anthony Hornez
Martapuraï (?)
Julien Bleitrach
Martapuraï (?)
Maxime Babara Touré
Martapuraï (?)
Sasha Luss
Princess Lïhio-Minaa
Aymeline Valade
Emperor Haban-Limaï
Elizabeth Debicki
Emperor Haban-Limaï (Voice)
Pauline Hoarau
Empress Aloï
Barbara Weber Scaff
Empress Aloï (Voice)
Marilhéa Peillard
Tsûuri
Lee Delong
Tsûuri (Voice)
Diva Cam
Mâatri (Tsûuri's Friend)
Judith Brunett
Mâatri (Tsûuri's Friend) (voice)
Marie Barrouillet
Tsûuri Child
Cindy Bruna
Pearl Guard
Sija Titko
Pearl Guard
Daphnée Kbidi
Tortured Pearl
Nick Marzock
Tortured Pearl (voice)
Ola Rapace
Major Gibson
Stefan Konarske
Captain Zito
Mahamadou Coulibaly
Major Gibon's Soldier
Julien Marlin
Major Gibon's Soldier
Yvan Lucker
Major Gibon's Soldier
Tom Hygreck
Major Gibon's Soldier
Gavin Drea
Sergeant Cooper
Abel Jafri
Bus Driver
Eric Lampaert
Guide Thazet
Paul Lefevre
Siirt Guard (?)
Guillaume Maison
Siirt Salesman
Paul Lefevre
Siirt Salesman
Laurent Ferraro
Igon Siruss
John Goodman
Igon Siruss (voice)
Mahamadou Coulibaly
Igon Junior
Jean-Robert Lombard
Igon Sirus Guard
Leonid Glushchenko
Igon Sirus Guard
Peter Eberst
Igon Sirus Guard
Akim Chir
Igon Sirus Guard
Laminé Ba
Igon Sirus Guard
Aurélien Gaya
Igon Sirus Guard
Jean-François Lenogue
Igon Sirus Guard
Tonio Descanvelle
Da
Mathieu Kassovitz
Hawker
Lee Delong
Tourist
Velvet D'Amour
Tourist
James Flynn
Guide #2
Tonio Descanvelle
Doghan-Dagui
Laurent Ferraro
Doghan-Dagui
Doug Rand
Doghan-Dagui
Grant Moninger
Doghan-Dagui (voice)
Robbie Rist
Doghan-Dagui (voice)
Christopher Swindle
Doghan-Dagui (voice)
(as Christopher Swindel)
Alexandre Willaume
Captain Kris
Chloe Hollings
Alex-Intruder's Voice (voice)
Réginal Kudiwu
Major Samk
Claire Tran
Control Room Sergeant
Étienne Ménard
Red Zone Captain
Peter Lamarque
Warship Captain
Maximilien Seweryn
K-Tron Captain
Zouheir Zerhouni
K-Tron Warrior
Tristan Zerbib
K-Tron Warrior
Jonas Bloquet
K-Tron Warrior
Elliot Jenicot
Interrogation Room Captain
(as Elliot Jenicot de la Comédie Française)
Staiv Gentis
Control Room Soldier
Jonas Bloquet
Control Room Soldier
Emilie Goldblum
Bubble dancer
Claire Tran
Bubble Glamopod
Anders Heinrichsen
Police Officer
Alain Etoundi
Club Bouncer
(as Alain 'Biff' Etoundi)
Fayet Nsumoto
Club Bouncer
Kristina Kachinskaya
Creature 'Twin'
Veronika Khayla
Creature 'Twin'
Sissi Duparc
Creature 'Louis XVI'
Pauline Hoarau
Creature 'Swing Angel'
Noam Frost
Creature 'Bird Woman'
Sand Van Roy
Creature 'Jessica Rabbit'
Pauline Serreau
Creature 'Tattoo'
Sasha Luss
Creature 'Candy Dress'
Tristan Robin
Roper
Philippe Rigot
Hero Merchant
Aguendia Fotabong
Boulan Bathor Emperor
Tania Dessources
Boulan Bathor Emperor's Wife
Gaëtan Cotigny
Fisherman
François Bredon
Fisherman
Cédric Chevalme
Bubble Boulan Bathor
Sam Douglas
American Tourist
Irene Palko
Female Tourist
Thomas Stafford
NASA Astronaut (archive)
Alexey Leonov
Russian Cosmonaut (archive)
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American Astronauts
Unknown32451
American Astronaut
Unknown32451
Chinese cosmonaut
Unknown32451
Chinese cosmonaut
Unknown32451
docking sequence astronaut
Unknown32451
docking sequence astronaut
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docking sequence astronaut
Unknown32451
docking sequence astronauts
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Indian astronaut
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Indian astronaut
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Indian astronaut
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Indian astronaut
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Hudson's crewman
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Hudson's crewman
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Saudi astronaut
Unknown32451
Saudi astronaut
Unknown32451
Hudson's crewman
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Hudson's crewman
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African astronaut
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African astronaut
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African astronaut
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Herbie Hancock
Bubble Defence Minister

Tony Sullivan: Vidcaps & Notes